Who’s On Your Bus: The Team That Builds You
- Elizabeth Angel Gardon
- Apr 12
- 4 min read
Choose wisely. Life is too short for anything less.
I recently watched an Instgram reel of Mike Krzyzewski talk about something his mom told him before he started high school.
She said:
Be careful who you put on your bus.
At first, he thought she meant an actual bus.
But she didn’t.
She meant his life.
She meant that one day, he would be the one driving — and the people he chose to bring with him would either help carry him forward… or quietly pull him away from who he was meant to become.
I haven’t stopped thinking about that.
Because the truth is…
We don’t get through life alone.
And the people on our bus matter more than we realize.
There have been incredible angels in Ohio.
People who showed up for us in ways I will never forget.
People who loved us, prayed for us, supported our kids, and stood beside us in some really hard seasons.
But if I’m being honest…
There were also people who were never truly for us.
People who didn’t genuinely want to see our kids shine.
People who smiled close up, but didn’t carry the kind of love or loyalty you build a life on.
And that’s a hard realization — especially as a mom.
Because sometimes…
You let people stay on your child’s bus longer than they should.
Not out of weakness.
Out of hope.
Out of grace.
Out of wanting to believe the best in people.
And I did that with Elie.
There were relationships — friendships and teammates — that, looking back, I should have protected her from sooner.
Not because anyone was outwardly unkind.
But because something underneath it didn’t feel right.
It wasn’t rooted in true support.
It felt like comparison.
Like quiet competition.
Like someone who didn’t fully want her to shine.
This weekend, watching her play in her AAU basketball tourney…
I saw it.
Moments where she hesitated.
Moments where her confidence flickered — not because she didn’t have it, but because somewhere along the way, she had learned to hold back just a little.
And after that last game, I told her the truth.
“That part is on me.”
Not in guilt.
In ownership.
Because part of my role as her mom is helping her choose her bus — or, when she’s still young, choosing it with her.
And sometimes that means having the courage to say:
This person doesn’t get a seat anymore.
But here’s the beautiful part.
She’s on the right bus now.
A bus filled with love.
With teammates who celebrate her.
With coaches who build her up.
With friends who want good things for her — and mean it.
From AAU to club soccer…
And now, moving back to Wisconsin…
Back to lifelong friendships.
Back to family.
Back to community.
Back to the kind of people who don’t compete with your light —
they help you shine it brighter.
And this week…
Life reminded us just how much that matters.
My parents received devastating news.
Their lifelong best friends — a husband and wife who built a beautiful life together — were suddenly thrown into unimaginable loss.
He passed away without warning.
One moment he was making plans — signing up for a golf league, excited for the season ahead — and the next, everything changed.
He was only 73.
Too young.
So much more life to live.
So much more to give.
And as if that heartbreak wasn’t enough…
She lost her mother at the same time.
Grief layered on grief.
Shock layered on shock.
The kind of pain that no one is ever prepared for.
This is a family we grew up alongside.
Four kids — one older brother, three younger sisters — just like us.
Summers together.
Memories stacked over years.
Now grandchildren filling in the next generation.
And he…
He was quiet.
But so kind.
The kind of man who showed love through what he did —
for his kids, his grandkids, his family.
The kind of man who reminds me so much of my dad.
No wonder they were such good friends.
This one really hits home.
Because moments like this…
They strip everything else away.
The noise.
The distractions.
The petty things we give our time and energy to.
And they leave you with one question:
Who’s on your bus?
Because life is too short…
To spend time on relationships that drain you.
That compete with you.
That don’t truly love you.
We need the people who show up.
The ones who sit beside you in both joy and heartbreak.
The ones who celebrate your kids like they’re their own.
The ones who pray for you.
The ones who hold you up when you can’t stand on your own.
The ones who help you become who God created you to be.
Those are your people.
Those are your angels.
So choose wisely.
Hold them close.
Prioritize them.
And don’t be afraid…
To stop the bus
and let the wrong people off.
Because the ride is short.
But the team that builds you?
They make all the difference. ✨
“Be careful who you put on your bus.
They will either carry you…
or pull you away from who you’re meant to become.”
— Coach K
